.They call it LOVE.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

~ 'Secret Admirer'?? ~ 11:26:00 pm

Everything started off as a normal day... Back to work again after 4 days of rest, not looking forward to work, etc...

Reached work at about 1.20pm, got ready to change and stuffs... Then my ward clerk came in, saw me and told me something... And I was like, "Huh?"...

So when I stepped into the ward to work, my colleagues were asking, "Nadiah, have you seen it?"...

To my utmost surprise, guess what I saw??

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THIS!!!

Never in my WHOLE life, have I ever received a bouquet of flowers... I mean, yes, I'm excited and puzzled at the same time so as to whom sent me those flowers... Yes, it's a mystery sender... Just hope that it's not any stalker... *Haha*...

Now, everyone can't stop teasing me about my 'secret admirer'... Yes, the card served no purpose... The message inside the card?? Cannot say lah... It's a secret... *Haha*...

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

Monday, March 27, 2006

~ Happy!! ~ 10:56:00 pm

*Heh*... I am one happy girl...

I had not one, but TWO dates today... *Wahaha*...

No, I'm not a 'two-timer'... *Hee*...

My first date was with HIM... Went to catch 'The Hills Have Eyes'... Very gross and quite a lot of shocking parts... But still, I enjoyed the show... Although the time spent with him was short, but every moment spent is precious... *Hehe*...

Second date... With my ever-dearest Fione... Our usual pizza date... *Hee*... Caught up with work, friends and stuff... And as usual, still the forever-singing gal... *Hehe*...

Whatever it is, I'm glad that I've spent my day with people who are precious to me...

And yes, it's back to work tomorrow... *Bah!!*...

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

Saturday, March 25, 2006

~ Far Away ~ 2:45:00 pm

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
You know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving
Hold on to me and
Never let me go

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

~ No date... *Blergh* ~ 2:07:00 pm

*Sigh*... Was so looking forward for today... But alas! Last minute changes so there'll be no date... *Heh*...

Oh well...

So bored of staying at home... Furthermore, I'm not working for 4 days... Well, it's a good break for me... Especially after all that had happened...

I wanna go shopping... Let's see if I can ask for a date with my parents instead... *Haha*...

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

Friday, March 24, 2006

~ Thank You... From Me to You... ~ 1:09:00 am

I'm feeling a lot more better today...

At the point when I was writing yesterday's entry, I was feeling really depressed... Really down in spirits and almost on the verge of tears...

No one knew what I was going through and what was running through my mind... Not even my sister who's very close to me, cuz I pretended that I was okay, when I wasn't... Not even HIM, cuz I didn't want him to worry about me... No one except ALLAH and one person...

I'm very, very thankful to this special person who was there to comfort me, trying to bring up my morale, making sure that I will stand up again after my each and every fall... And you know what? I'm not even that close to this person cuz what we shared is more of a formal relationship rather than a personal one... But despite that, she seems to understand me more than that... And I'm really grateful for that...

The chat with her last night really made me open up my eyes wider to my surroundings... The blunder that I made was quite major but she was there, ever so forgiving... Telling me not to make this incident as a setback but rather as a strength, so that I will never ever make this silly mistake again...

There she was, trying to boost my morale again... There she was, making sure that I would stand up again... There she was, pointing out all my mistakes but never scolding me... There she was, guiding me along...

This person may just be another human like you and me... But to me, she's my 'angel'...

To this special person of mine (she may not be reading this but if she does, she should know who she is), thank you for being there for me... And most of all, thanks for understanding and guiding me instead of scolding me... That was what I really needed... Thank you very much, from the bottom of my sincere heart...

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

~ Mistakes ~ 11:59:00 pm

People always say you'll learn from mistakes... But how many more mistakes must I make before I learn?

I'm going through the worst period of my life again...

*Sigh*...

I really feel that I've let so many people down... I'm sorry...........

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

Friday, March 17, 2006

~ On Cloud Nine ~ 11:25:00 pm

*Sigh*... I'm on cloud nine...

I'm just feeling so happy today...

And thanks to YOU for the great day although most of the things we did were meaningless... *Haha*... Can't wait to see YOU again...

Alhamdulillah...

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

~ Happiness.... Will it remain? ~ 12:30:00 am

It's kinda late and I'm still not yet asleep... That's cuz I'm not working tomorrow! Erm... Correction, make it today cuz it's already after 12 midnight... *Hehe*...

I really can't wait for today to come!! I'm gonna be so happy... *Grinz*... Just hope that there's no last minute change of plans...

And oh... I saw someone yesterday... It was purely unintentional... Just 'ran' into him... But I guess he didn't even see me at all... Or just pretended not to see me...

Oh well............

But who cares! I've found my happiness for now... Praying hard that it will not be as shortlived as the rest...

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

~ More updates! ~ 8:27:00 pm

I hate it when I have to take care of patients with chest tube... It's even worse if I have a patient with a chest tube in the isolation room...

No, I'm not being prejudice in anyway but it's just a bad experience that made me feel this way...

I'm currently taking care of this patient who's on chest tube and to top it all up, the patient is in the isolation room... I somewhat have a phobia of taking care of patients with chest tube...

Wanna know why? Click here to find out more...

It has traumatised me quite badly that in the 9 months of working as a nurse, taking care of people with chest tubes was what I hated the most... Which I hated to the core... But something that I can never avoid in my whole nursing career...

I'm praying hard that history will never repeat itself again...

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On a lighter note, I had finally spend some time with my family on Sunday... It was such a great feeling for me...

Finally I got the opportunity to go out with my sis again... Yeah I really missed her A LOT...

And of course, to relieve my stress, I went shopping... *Hehe*... At the end of the day, my feet was just so sore and felt so bounded by the so-very-the-tight shoes that I ended up buying a pair of slippers... =P

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I'm going on night duties again soon... In fact, it's this coming weekend... Yeah, it's gonna be a weekend night again... $Ka-shing$... *Hehe*...

But then again, it's not as much... Cuz I'm intending to plan for a holiday with my family soon... =)

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I'm in such a happy mood these few days...

In fact, one of my ex-lecturer, who's currently teaching in Ngee Ann Poly, asked me, "Why do you look so cheerful when everyone else is so grumpy?"...

My answer was very simple, "Because I have to be cheerful... Only then my patients will be as cheerful as me... If not, they too will be as grumpy..." *Hehe*...

But the real reason behind my happiness? There's just something which I'm not telling, yet... *Shhhhhh*... *Hehehe*...

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

~ UPDATES!!! ~ 10:48:00 pm

Looking after a demented patient can be a real challenging task... From handling his mood swings to his behaviour patterns... It can be quite unbearable sometimes...

Currently, there's this female patient in my ward who is suffering from dementia... Well, this patient is mobile so we allow her to walk around in the ward, provided that she doesn't disturb anyone else, which is almost impossible... We can see that the other patients' relatives are quite scared of her... It's quite understood cuz imagine if someone just comes up to you and starts scolding you, you would get scared too...

Her behaviour can change from happy to sad to angry drastically... For example today, she just started crying and wailing loudly without any apparent reason... After which, she started to get agitated and almost wanted to hit one of the doctors...

And about 2pm in the afternoon, I had this one transfer in case from the ICU and this old lady started to get so agitated that she took one of my patients' walking stick and wanted to hit everyone around her... Of course the students (luckily we had some NP nursing students on attachment) were around to stop her but of course, they were scared of her too...

Although she is not directly under my care, but it can get quite frustrating sometimes...

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Apparently, working with this particular doctor is not so bad after all...

Initially, he had such a bad reputation with our ward because he would come super early to work and demanded the discipline census from us... And there was once when he actually argued with one of the nurses in our ward because of this issue...

So imagine how 'dreadful' it was when we found out that he was covering the patients over at my side...

Initially, he couldn't get along well with us but after a few days, we finally realised that he's not so bad as what we made him to be... Just that, he's TOO hyper (just like some nurses in the ward) and TOO enthusiatic...

But after working with him for 3 days straight, well, he's not so bad after all... In fact, he's quite a nice person too...

This is what they call the practitioner-nurse relationship... Which IS important...

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Looks like I am not able to go for my driving lessons any time soon...

Apparently, I went over to SSDC yesterday with the intention of getting a new PDL so that I can start learning driving again...

Anyway, when I wanted to apply, the person said that I had to bring along my old PDL so that she is able to renew it for me... So I asked her what if I lost it? She told me that I had to make a police report even though it was already expired...

The deep shit part was... I THREW AWAY MY EXPIRED PDL!! I mean, how was I supposed to know that I could still use the old PDL... So, am I supposed to tell Mr Policeman that I threw away my PDL? *Shucks*...

Looks like I will have to wait till my FTT expires... *DARN!*...

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

Sunday, March 05, 2006

~ What a great day!! ~ 11:26:00 pm

For the first time, I have never felt so relaxed and happy at work...

1) 'Ran' out of the hospital during working time with my colleague and the both of us had Long John Silver! *Haha*... To be honest, I have never dreamt of doing so during working time especially since the ward is so busy... But today was such a good day... I was already in a good mood from the start (except for my sleepy-ness)... Furthermore, things was very much settled... And also, no NO in the ward! *Haha*...

2) A relative complimented me... To be in depth, she complimented that I was, well, 'pretty'... *HAHAHA!*... Anyway, I was updating the relatives on the patients' condition and at the end of it, one of them told me that I looked pretty in my staff ID card... So I jokingly asked, "So I'm not pretty in person??"... And she too jokingly answered with a wink, "No, you're just as pretty now but I cannot take you home right? I was even thinking of asking the one of the photo in the card."...
So sweet of her... *Hehe*... No wonder they always say to build rapport with the relatives... Everything is so much easier...

Well, everything just went my way today and of course, it made my day even better...
Alhamdulillah...

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

Saturday, March 04, 2006

~ To my dearest Sister ~ 9:23:00 pm

Was on my way home from work when suddenly, I thought of her... Standing at the corner in the MRT, looking at the sceneries outside and my mind started to wonder...

When was the last time we spent a day out together and not having to worry about anything?
When was the last time we sat down and had a heart-to-heart talk with her?
When was the last time we had shared a secret with each other?

It's been a long time I guess... Especially ever since she started working... She, with her irregular working shift, and me, with my unpredictable work schedule...

Anyway, the person I'm talking about here is none other than my one and only sister...

I realised that I really miss her...

Yes, the sisterly bond that the both of us shared is still strong... We still communicate, talk to each other everyday (except when I don't meet her cuz of our work timing), ask each other how's the day and such...

But I miss those times when we would have our 'sisterly' talk before bedtime... I miss going out with her during my free days... I miss doing up her hair into all different kinds of 'style' (note the inverted commas)...

I have sacrificed a lot of my time for her, even the rest of my family, because of work... Whenever I get back from work, I would be so drained out and I would prefer to just rest and keep quiet... I do anticipate this coming of course, but to the extend of affecting me emotionally, I don't...

Of course, we had our squabbles and arguments here and there... There are also times when we would say, "I don't like you" or "I wished you weren't here" kind of stuff... But deep down inside, we know we love each other very much that we would protect one another...

All I can say now is... Kakak, I really miss you...

Maybe, this is what she felt when I first started working too...

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi

Friday, March 03, 2006

~ Boredom.... ~ 11:42:00 pm

It's already March...

I'm getting bored...

Bored of everything...

Having lesser and lesser things to blog about...

SO BORED!! *Sigh*...

Anyway, still contemplating... Should I start my driving lessons again or should I use the money to save up for my degree instead?? *Hmm*.........

written, NaDiaH eRNiYaNTi